Mandatory Beer Goggles

dumbTop o’ the mornin’ to ye!

You may have a cold one on me this afternoon / evening (provided you pay for it yourself). And for those of you “celebrators” doing kegs and eggs and the like, well…wobble safely.


The Real issue: Helmet Head

Even Lloyd and Harry wore helmets, right?
That is pretty much the argument going on in the Legislature right now.

Two of the main arguments for “Repeal the Mandatory Helmets!” going on in Unicameral are:

1) if you repeal must-wear-a-helmet, every motorcycle ridin’ yahoo will stop wearing a helmet, wipeout, smash their brain, not have insurance, and cost everyone else tons of money.

2) Ah, but if we KEEP the law, thousands upon thousands of helmet-less HOG riders will avoid Nebraska like the boss on the afternoon of St. Paddy’s Day, and not give us those sweet-sweet tourist dollars.

Now…are either of these completely legit?

Yes, I know there are probably a few stats out there that say 5 more brain injuries will set us back a billion dinero. But are any put out by something other than the “We Hate Motorcycles” groups?

And is there any realistic evidence that riders are currently avoiding Nebraska en masse — of even if they are, what sort of cash loss we’re talking about?

(I’m supposing there is an argument that people avoid Nebraska on their way up to Sturgis. But are they ALL hatless?)

And then the one that cracked me up was that State Sen. Dave Bloomfield is willing to give in on his repeal a little — by instead requiring goggles to be worn! So…aren’t we right back to the same thing?

If you’re going to require goggles, how about requiring leather pants, jacket and boots? Where is the skin-graft lobby on all of this?

So for those of you Unicam watchers and staff (hey you can’t watch the basketball, you might as well be reading Leavenworth St!), weigh in and take sides on this a little. You don’t need to (and can’t anyway) add a link, but refer to study X that everyone can Google if need be (please no giant quotes). Or better yet, give your own argument.

Just try to keep the green food coloring off the keyboard.

He meant “Lucy”, as in Ball…

Former House Speaker John Boehner said yesterday that if the GOP nomination should go to an open convention, he is all in for…Paul Ryan.

Ryan of course deftly avoided this conversation by stating that he is categorically NOT running for President, and would not accept the job if offered.

Mmm hmm.

Just like House Ways and Means Chairman Paul Ryan said he would NOT accept the gig as Speaker.

In the mean time, apparently Boehner went on to refer to Senator Ted Cruz as...Lucifer.


The next shoe?

Senator Deb Fischer stuck to her word and has NOT yet endorsed Ted Cruz after her guy Marco Rubio dropped out.

Currently Cruz has one (or is it two) Senators on his side.

Two more than Donald Trump I think, though.



Have a great day and evening and drive — or better yet, Uber — safely!


  1. Anonymous says:

    You forgot – The short fingered vulgarian has the secured the formal allegiance of non other than Alabama’s Senator Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III.

    In fact, only hours ago the Tufted Talking Yam appointed J. Beauregard III, as Chairman of his Foreign Policy Advisory Committee.

    Coincidentally, the third iteration of Jeffrey Beauregard Sessions has his himself a somewhat notable history confronting protesters. In 2005, speaking out against a Washington D.C. crowd that had the prior day assembled to protest the Iraq war, Mr. Sessions did declare:
    “The group who spoke here the other day did not represent the American ideals of freedom, liberty and spreading that around the world.”

    It would therefore be reasonable to imagine that in a Trump administration, Mr Sessions III would, with great conviction and animated vigor, pick up the torch laid down by George W. and again commence to a spreadin’ o’ the freedom, courtesy of the deft strokes of finely honed U.S. Military bayonets.

      • Sparkles says:

        Why, hello! How in the name of Jaysus are ya, Miss Annie?

        Sadly, my writing style can best be described as ‘participatory’.
        Making sense of it requires the reader to take it upon themselves to cast aside the misplaced words and superfluous sentences.

        Alas, the effort is honest.

      • Sparkles says:

        Kind of liked that one myself.
        And it emerged from the sporadic crackles of my own challenged synapses. so it’s free for all to use, without license.

  2. Pete says:

    I hope Danielle Conrad downloaded the Uber app for today! The snow plows may be off the roads for the season but those darn asphalt trucks are just as big and blend in just as well to the landscape.

  3. Sparkles says:

    Just when you thought you’d witness a bottoming. This is simply shocking.

    Today, Cruz is releasing his list of foreign policy advisers. On it, is Frank F’ing Gaffney.

    I know there remains a majority among the Republican party that are sane, thoughtful, upstanding people. Pillars of their families and respective communities.
    You people no longer have a choice.
    You need to burn that party to ground.

  4. Anonymous says:

    I’m in favor of the helmet repeal, along with the warning label repeal. While the democrats do their best to lower the bar, the Republicans ought to do their best to raise the bar.

    • Sparkles says:

      I’ve got a compromise. Add to the NE drivers license and option we’ll call: ‘Check Off For Freedom’.
      Just like the organ donor option, it would optional for all.

      With a Check Off For Freedom, you’re supporting the right for yourself and others to ride a motorcycle, ATV, mini-bike, snowmobile.. whatever, sans helmet, sans shirt, hell.. sans pants.
      You’re also volunteering to add your name to a pool of people willing to pay the hospital expenses and long term care for those who become intermingled with the pavement or the blue spruce.
      A pool of people who can be directly contacted by healthcare facilities should account collections become necessary.

      It’s a win-win.
      But of course with freedom, comes responsibility.
      We got a deal?

  5. Pete Conrad says:

    I do not think it is anyone’s business if someone wears a motorcycle helmet. Just like it is not anyone’s business if someone of the same sex gets married.

  6. Ah crap, it’s St. Patrick’s Day, my least favorite day of the year. A day when guys named Kolowski go out and drink two six-packs of urine-colored liquid they laughably call beer, before puking their guts up, and blaming it on us. Thank the atheist deity I’m traveling today; I can’t believe they’ll bother to put up garish green decorations in O Hare.

    Meanwhile, David Aaronovitch in the London Times used this Irish national holiday to lecture us on our own history, which apparently was all about us being mean to and distrusting our betters on the other side of the Irish Sea. Nothing like disparaging the Easter rebellion without mentioning the three centuries of oppression that foreshadowed it, for context. He even got the number executed in the aftermath wrong.

    My only request for St. Patrick’s day; if you’re not actually Irish (and your granddaddy digging potatoes in Co. Tipperary doesn’t count), then STFU.

    • repenting lawyer says:

      ProfGH, My grandfather who dig potatoes in the Old Sod believed his feast day in America should be left to the Prods to show what fools they really are. Is that an acceptable alternative? Sure the way reg day is celebrated was not in the plans of Luke Waddington, OFM.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Having flown, sailed, rappelled, skydived and scuba’d, sometimes with a hangover, I must agree that “Helmet law” is a perfect topic for St. Patrick’s Day when much stupidity rules. However, I never did anything so suicidally stupid so as to endanger other people.

    Hundreds of pounds of whirling moving shards of red hot steel, straining to fly apart, nestled between a man’s legs is proof of stupidity. A legislator who allows that man to ride that steel among citizens at combined highway speeds of 110 MPH is proof of the legislator’s stupidity.

    The helmet argument is misleading because motorcycle riders don’t want goggles either, at speeds fast enough for road gravel, bugs, and bird feces to puncture eyeballs and shatter teeth.

    Forget insurance costs. Motorcycles endanger all citizens. A highway is a public route full of people speeding along in enclosed vehicles, each surrounded by safety glass, plastic, and crumple zones that crumple vital organs. You can land and take off jets on I-80. That too would be stupid.

    On private land? Sure, ride your 1200 cc with a cherry bomb up your arse while drinking drano. That helps clean the gene pool. But on a public roadway? Not hardly.

    You want road freedom? Buy your own road.

  8. Ricky says:

    Helmet law falls to filibuster. I am just surprised why people waste time debating it.
    Coming up soon is the Howard Hawks for King bill LB 1109, which Hawks forced Murante to introduce.
    Enough of Mr Hawks and the regents ignoring the open records laws, lets just change them so, and I know it’s a long shot, Mr Hawks won’t get arrested.

  9. Sparkles says:

    Poor Sen. Bloomfield, forced to witness once again his raison d’etre evaporate like cerebrospinal fluid on the sizzling summer asphalt.

    It should be noted that in addition to perennially wasting countless legislative hours on this prattle, Sen Bloomfield also was one of only 3 co-sponsors of Kintner’s nutball anti-Agenda 21 bill. A Glenn Beck promoted bit of sheer lunacy purporting President Obama and the United Nations are using “mind-control” to steal land right out from under the Buster Brown shod feet of freedom lovin’ Amurricans. Our illegitimate, gay bath house frequenting, terrorist sympathizing President engaged in a secret plot to bring about a “one world order” and a “new Dark Ages of pain and misery yet unknown to mankind,” Because… Jesus!!

    It was Bloomfield, Kintner, Tom Hansen of North Platte and Janssen who signed their names to this unhinged bit of crackpottery.

    Thanks, Tea Party! Keep sending in the clowns.

  10. Governry Thugery says:

    Was down at the court house today and it looks like Pete Ricketts thugs are interfering with the petition initiatives going on. What ever happened to the people being Nebraska’s 2nd house?

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